sometimes.
Sometimes, you just want to stop trying to catch up with your own effort. You just want to just drop the effort on the floor and walk away. When ever you know you've given more than half of yourself to do something , to put effort into something.. knowing your effort went to waste really does suck. I hate feeling like my effort was made for nothing and I hate the fact of knowing that I'm always having to wait. And sometimes, just sometimes.. your effort gets taken advantage of. When ever you're at your lowest spot, your weakest moment.. that's definitely when everybody will see your weakest side and will start taking advantage of you.But then again, after every moment of thinking twice of what to do, you end up not doing what you were planning to do anyway. you end up going against your own plan, going against your own mind. I hate feeling fragile. I always feel like I want to do what they're doing to me back at them. To make them realize how much it hurts and what it really feels like.. they won't know what the feelings like unless they go through it themselves right? well yeah , I tried attempting to do that. Guess it was a really bad idea, because I couldn't do it.
Argh, what a stressful night.
